Canada Journal because that's haow I feel at the moment.
First journal of the year and it's mot gonna be a happy one.
I am really struggling at the moment, as if you haven't guessed by my song choice and how I'm feeling.
I feel a lot like Canada at the moment and sick of it.
Do I have any help?
Yes, but she's going to college where I am Uni and her free days match up with my busiest. We don't get time to meet up any more.
What about my parents?
How can I explain this to them? They'll just think I'm stupid and its some hormone thing that I'm struggling with and tell me to get over it. Let it go...
What started this up?
The return of old events and the fear and inability to speak out against it. Hence feeling like Canada, alone, invisible and ignored. And I've always had to be invisible because I've been worried about setting the other person off and making everything go wrong.
But you know what, I don't care anymore. I'm going to put something up tonight that may cause people to hate me, think I'm just some attention whore or something and make them think I'm just stirring up some shit. But for those people who'll think that, I have a simple message for you.
I NEED TO EXPRESS MY FEELINGS TOO!!!
There are two sides to every story and I've been holding this in for too long. for it to be healthy because now it just hurts and it shouldn't any more.
If you un-watch me or whatever I understand, but its about time I spoke up too. On MANY occasions I've had to push myself and my own feelings aside for this person because some part of me somewhere actually cares. It's only causing me so many problems, I CAN'T LET IT GO, because I've had to bottle it up and stay silent for this long. Enough is enough. I've finally found a way to put this properly into words the way only I know how, a story (in play form, because I had to adapt it for my dramatic writing seminar) and that'll hopefully be the end of it.
No, I'm not going to name this person, anyone who has read the other side of all of this may already be able to guess.
You know what, judge me all you want for what I'm going to put up. I just need the closure.
Here it is.
SGAU - Things falling into place...And Then NotA/N
Warning to all regular readers, this one is written as a script-like thing. I was challenged to write a scene with an exit and entrance in for my dramatic writing seminar and this appeared. It would take it too long to put into a prose form so I'm just putting it up like this. I need to get this out there.
Sophia is pacing around the coffee table reading through a folder. She occasionally mutters something under her breath as she does so, only stopping when there is a ‘ping’ from the kitchen. She places the folder on the coffee table and heads into the kitchen to get her food out of the microwave. Whilst she is in there, the movement of wings can be heard and she places her meal on the bench to return to the living room. The room is empty so she shrugs and grabs the folder before returning to the kitchen, only to drop it once she opens it and finds that it isn’t the same one she left there. She kneels